


Moving on

by Farah_Rose



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Communication, Forgiveness, M/M, Magnus Bane Deserves Nice Things, Magnus Bane is a sweetheart;, Moving On, POV Camille Belcourt;, Past Magnus Bane/Camille Belcourt, Past Relationship(s), Protective Alec Lightwood, Supportive Alec Lightwood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-23
Updated: 2019-01-23
Packaged: 2019-10-14 19:20:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17514425
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Farah_Rose/pseuds/Farah_Rose
Summary: Camille is back in town after two years. She hopes to surprise her ex Magnus, so that they can pick up where they left off. She never expected to be the one surprised instead.





	Moving on

**Author's Note:**

> I had an idea to write a story based from Camille'a POV. As usual, it was supposed to be short but oh well. :)
> 
> PLEASE NOTE THAT THIS STORY IS NOT SET IN THE CANON UNIVERSE. IT IS AN ALTERNATE UNIVERSE WHERE ALL CHARACTERS ARE HUMANS AND NOT FROM IN THE WORLD CC CREATED FOR THEM.

He was going to be surprised, she thought as she approached closer to his building. She couldn’t wait to see the look on his face. Oh how she missed him. No one made her feel the way Magnus did. No matter how many time she left, he was always waiting for her when she got back. It was one thing she could count on in her chaotic life. She could already feel him under her fingertips, licking her lips trying to remember the taste of him. Excitement strumming under her skin when she saw the familiar entrance of his loft.

  
She was so lost in her thoughts that she almost missed the voices coming out the building in front of her. She could recognize one of them from a mile away, her heart raced. No matter how things happen, his voice never failed to affect her this way. She didn’t recognize the other voice though but she didn’t care. She quickened her pace to catch the door as it opened and Magnus Bane walked out.

  
Her breath was stuck, she gasped. His hair was expertly styled, like a waterfall, cascading to one side and frozen in place. He wore a black iridescent jacket that shimmered under the lights every time his shoulders shook. His navy blue collared shirt hugged his chest, the ascot of the same colour was loose around his neck adding a touch of casual elegance. It was tucked into these leather pants that wrapped around his strong legs, form fitting, she was lost for words. Even his black suede shoes looked like it was tailor made just for him. He looked stunning and for a moment, she forgot why she left in the first place.  
He was laughing, his head thrown back, his throat exposed, Adam’s apple bobbing as his beautiful laughter fill the air. She swallowed. She could see a shadow of red, gold and orange on his eye lids. Her throat felt parched for some reason. Camille was dumbstruck. She had no idea Magnus could laugh like that, so carefree, so freely.

  
Her eyes eventually gravitated to the person next to him. Magnus was standing close to the man, his hand holding unto the man’s bicep. He was taller, slightly taller than Magnus and somewhat slimmer in physical built but one could tell he was also in excellent shape. He was not as expressive with his wardrobe as Magnus was, wearing a black leather jacket, over a lovely blue and white diamond patterned shirt, tucked into dark navy ripped jeans and black boots. If Camille didn’t have Magnus clouded shades, she would have said he was handsome.

  
She was unprepared, though, when two pairs of eyes noticed her staring, one out of curiosity but the other in complete shock.

  
“Camille.” She pretended it didn’t hurt when his smile dropped immediately when he saw her. His hand dropped to intertwined with the other man, who squeezed back. Was that in comfort? Why would Magnus need comfort against her? She plastered her smile on her face like a tattoo and walked closer, mustering all the confidence she knew she possessed.

  
“Hello love. I’m back.” She made sure to add that extra shake of her hips to get his attention. But it was in vain.

  
“What are you doing here?” He asked, monotone, his expression blank.

  
“What do you mean? I always come here first when I’m in town.” She tilted her head to look at him, still smiling.

  
“It’s been two years.” He blinked, not letting go of the hand or making a move to get closer to her.

  
“That never mattered before.” She stated confidently, her hands on her hips.

  
“Things change.” He said, showing her no emotion, like she was a stranger to him.

  
“Since when?” She asked, hiding her nerves with years of practice.

  
“Since now.” He declared.

  
“Interesting.” She mused, more to herself. She was marvelled at his tone and behaviour.

  
“What do you want, Camille?” The question she’s been waiting for. She inched a little closer.

  
“To pick up where we left off.” She answered truthfully, putting as much sugar into her voice as she could.

  
“That’s never going to happen.” He scoffed, eyes rolling.

  
“Because of him?” She pointed a perfectly manicured finger at her competition. Her pride taking a beating but she would not let that show. To show weakness would be to die.

  
“He is my boyfriend. But he’s not the only reason. I do not want it to happen.” He stared back at her, eyes defiant. She had to admit, she was trilled at his attitude.

  
“Hmm. You’ve grown some balls, baby boy.” She missed the way the man next to Magnus tensed and Magnus communicating with his eyes that made the other man clench his jaw from speaking.

  
“Never call me that again. We have somewhere to be. I trust you remember your way out.” He looked away, the anger in his eyes trying to simmer down, like he was holding back something big.

  
“Ooh. Feisty. You always played hard to get. I’m not worried.” She smirked, eye brow raised in challenge.

  
“Goodbye Camille.” Magnus didn’t take her bait. He took hold of his boyfriend’s hand and walked away hurriedly.

  
She watched them walk a small distance away, then stopped. Magnus was patting his jacket pocket, he frowned. She couldn’t make out the words too clearly but she heard a small part of their conversation.

  
“I forgot my phone on the table. I need to run up and get it.” Magnus was saying to the other man.

  
“I’ll wait for you here.” Came the reply. His deep voice suited him, she thought.

  
“I’ll be quick.” Magnus said with a small smile.

  
“I hope you don’t say that again in another context.” The man winked, teasingly. Camille’s blood began to boil.

  
“Oh my god. Hush you.” Magnus’ small laugh drew her attention back to him. He gently smacked the man on his chest with the back of his hand.

  
“You love it., Mr. Bane.” The man grabbed his hand and kissed it.

  
“I love you, Mr. Lightwood." Magnus breathed, looking at the man lovingly.

  
“I love you too.” The man responded, leaning down to kiss Magnus on the forehead before he pushed past her, ignoring her, into the building.

  
She was furious. She felt like she was being cheated on. How dare him? How dare he treated her this way? She made her way closer to the man, who was busy on his own phone.

“It would never work out. You and him. He always finds his way back to me.” She said.

  
“If you think that, then you never deserved him in the first place.” He responded without looking up from his phone.

  
“Excuse me?” she couldn’t believe he could be so rude to her.

  
“I know who you are.” His hazel eyes locked with hers, narrowed with annoyance and anger as he stared at her. “I know what you are trying to do. It’s not going to work. You cannot scare me or intimidate me. Magnus is mature enough to fight his own battles, you should do the same.” He said, dismissing her, like she was some street rat who wasn’t worth his time. He focused on his phone again.

  
“Are you stupid enough to let me talk to him alone?” She crossed her arms, not giving up until she got a proper reaction. He sighed, slipping his phone into his pants pocket, he shifted to look at her.

  
“I do not _let_ Magnus do anything. He is his own person. I support him and trust him, whether good or bad, he will talk to me. Do you know what that’s like?” He didn’t move a muscle. She was annoyed beyond belief.

  
“You little....” she wanted to smack the smug look off his face.

  
“Leave my boyfriend out of this, Camille.” Magnus hand was on her shoulder, pulling her back. He stood between her and the man. “You want to talk so bad, then talk. Can you give us a minute babe?” He turned, phrasing the rhetorical question with a softer tone than he used with her. They were having a silent moment in front her, communicating with their eyes. Her fists clenched, nails digging into her palm.

  
“I’ll be right over there if you need me.” The man said when they finally broke out their trance. He caressed down Magnus arm until his hand fell to his side.

  
“Okay.” Magnus whispered, kissing him on the cheek, waiting until his boyfriend was out earshot.

“You wanted to talk. Talk.” He crossed his arms. He looked bigger from the last time she saw him, more muscular, healthier.

  
“He knows about me?” It wasn’t what she wanted to say but it was the first thing out her mouth.

  
“He knows everything.” He responded simply.

  
“And yet he stayed with you, if he knows what we mean to each other?” She gauged his reaction, for something, anything, to know if he held any feelings at all for her anymore.

  
“He knows what you did to me, every time you left, what you said to me, how you treated me. How you almost broke me. He knows how much you shattered my heart, over and over again. He helped me pick up the pieces and put myself together again. He waited until I was happy with myself again before asking me out on a date. He doesn’t stifle me, he doesn’t judge me. He inspires me. He supports me. He’s patient and caring. He loves _me_ how I _deserve_ to be loved. And I love _him_.” Every sentence like a dagger to her heart.

  
When did he ever felt this way? How was she not aware of this? Wasn’t she good to him? “You never told me any of this. How was I to know you where unhappy?”

  
“Are you fucking kidding me?” For the first time he displayed an emotion. Not love like she hoped but anger. “Did you just asked me that? For years, Camille, years! I allowed you to play with me, play with my emotions, my life. You would show up and pretend I was your world, your everything. You would talk like you were invested in our relationship as much as I was. You would make me fall so deeply in love with you. And then you would leave. Without a trace, without a word. You would always leave, no explanation, no reason. I didn’t let it get to me because I wanted to believe you cared. We were young. You were just a free spirit, not wanting to be tie down and that you’ll always come back to me. But you never spoke to me, never told me how you felt. I was a man blindly in a relationship. It was good for a while. But after a few years of this, I wanted more, I needed more from you. And when I spoke to you about it, what did you do?” He didn’t shout at her but she flinched as if he did. The memory she kept buried and hidden came rushing to the surface. She hoped for a moment that he forgot about that.

  
“I didn’t mean it. I panicked okay. It was a reflex.” She raised her hands in defence to her words.

  
“A reflex? Instead of talking to me like a normal person, your reflex was to have sex with a random stranger in our bed?” He laughed in disbelief. The man behind them noticed Magnus’ distress, he raised his hand in question, asking if he needed to come closer. Magnus shook his head and waved him off, blowing a kiss in his direction.

“So this is it then. You don’t love me anymore.” The words sounding foreign to her ears. Magnus sighed, he looked tired having to stand here with her. She wanted to clutch at her chest with the sinking feeling in her heart. She was loosing him.

  
“I loved you, Camille. With everything in me, I loved you. And in some way, I will always love you.” A flicker of hope. “But I will never be in love with you any more. Alexander is it for me. He’s my present and future.” A flicker of hope extinguished.

  
“But he can’t. He can’t love you like I can.” Her stubborn refused to let her give up. Magnus was hers, he should always be hers.

  
“No he can’t. Because he loves me _better_.” He said, gaze falling on the said man for a short moment. She couldn’t deny that he believed the words he was saying.

  
“It’s not going to work out Magnus. It can never work out. You and I, we’re inevitable.” Her last attempted, grabbing at straws.

  
“Who the hell says it can’t? Do you know what Alec and I have that we never had?” His voice hard, expression hardened. She shook her head.

  
“Trust. Communication. Understanding. Mutual support.” Each word like a additional weight on her.

  
“We had those things.” She whispered, not fully believing them but still refusing to give up. She hang by a thread.

  
“No. You had them with yourself.” She knew what he was going to say but it still hurt nonetheless.

  
“Magnus.” She tried to deny but he cut off her argument before she had a chance.

  
“Do you think I want to go back to the same routine with you again? Never knowing when you’re going to leave or who you’re going to sleep with in our bed. It was a toxic cycle, Camille, one we allowed for far too long. We never fit together, you never saw me as your partner, your equal. I was just a comfort zone for you, someone to cling on to when your life became overwhelming. I told you that I truly loved you, I meant it. But you never truly loved me. And I don’t think you would he capable of loving anyone. Not until you learn to love yourself.” For the first time, his voice softened towards her. She could see the man he’d become without her. More mature, more confident, more abrasive.

  
“I can change. I can try and change for you.” She pleaded, desperately.

  
“Then it would be pointless. You need to change for yourself. But even then, it’ll still be over.” He sighed at her attempts, never giving in.

  
“You’re choosing him over me.” Her eyes began to sting, she blinked quickly.

  
“It was never a choice. _Alec has me_. I have him. But he doesn’t rule my life and my life doesn’t revolve around him. I don’t have to worry where he is or who he’s with if he’s not with me. He doesn’t get jealous of all my friends, he doesn’t try to cut me off my social life. I trust him. He trusts me. When we argue, we talk about it and work it out. Not leave for two years and never come back. We click, like we were made for each other. He makes me so happy, Camille. I never knew I could be. I thought I was destined for a toxic relationship with you. But Alec opened my eyes, he showed me what a relationship is suppose to be. And I love it. I love _him_.” The famous last words, the nails on her coffin. Any chance she had was gone, long gone, never to be returned again.

  
“I.... I don’t know what to say.” Did she just stutter? What was happening to her? Suddenly she felt tired.

  
“It wouldn’t matter. Nothing is going to change.”

  
“That’s it then. We’re really over.” She said the words to process them, for them to sink in.

  
“We have over for a long time. We just never wanted to accept it.” He said, knowingly.

  
“Okay.” She sighed. She was feeling so much older than she actually was. This is not how she expected her trip to turn out. She was determined to fight till her last breath for this but how could she? She heard herself how miserable he was. How he really felt being with her. She hurt him and she had no one to blame but herself. She could go on and on about her parents divorced when she was younger which lead to her fear in commitment. But Magnus was also a child of divorce and he turned out just fine. What was wrong with her? Why was she incapable of loving someone and being loved in return? Why was she so selfish?

  
“I wish you all the best, Camille. I hope you listen this time and find yourself. Find out who you are and not what people expect you to be.” Magnus’ soothing voice broke through her inner monologue. He was looking at her like he meant what he said. Like she deserved a chance to try again at life, just not with him.

  
“Sure.” She didn’t know how to respond anymore. But amidst all shattering of her heart, strange calm swept over her.

  
“I believe in you. I know you can do it.” He smiled, a genuine smile at her. It had none of the love he had when he smiled at his Alec but it was friendly and not hostile. It was a start she supposed “I have to go. It’s our first year anniversary and we have reservations. Take care of yourself. I hope you find happiness. Good night.” It was bittersweet.

  
“It was good to see you too. Goodbye Magnus.” And for the second time, he walked away and she didn’t call him back. She didn’t have the right anymore.

Camille could say with absolute certainty that Magnus Bane is the love of her life. But watching him get lost in the depths of Alec Lightwood, she can safely say she isn’t the love of his life, not anymore. And oddly enough, she was okay with that. The sting wasn’t as detrimental as she thought it would have been. For once in her life, she was going to do the right thing. She knows she isn’t suddenly reformed but this is her first step to being there. She has a long road ahead but she is ready and willing for a change. She spared on last glance at the lovers before heading in the opposite direction, never looking back.

  
Camille Belcourt is a survivor. She will be just fine.

**Author's Note:**

> I hoped you guys enjoyed that one. It was a bit different and I'm not good with emotions so I'm sorry if it seemed all over the place. I had a busy week at work hence no update on the Texting story! But i will try to give you guys a new chapter tomorrow. :)
> 
> Edit :I am sorry for locking off the anon commenting guys. Due to hate comments (now deleted) I ended up removing the option. It gave me serious anxiety and panic attacks. I never had those type of comments before on any of my stories whether it was directed at me or otherwise. I am really sorry anyone else who wanted to comment. 
> 
> As stated before, this is not the canon universe Camille. Anyone who has read any of my other stories would know that I treat canon Camille how she deserves, even on my other AU stories she is the antagonist for the most part, unredeemed. But this was not based on canon storytelling and I wanted to try something different from a different perspective and see how it could play out.


End file.
